Choosing Happiness – Robert Holden

We live our lives in the hopes that just one more thing will complete our happiness. The ego’s conditioned thought is that something is missing. And so we look for he missing piece to bring us salvation. And yet, no matter how many things we purchase, gather, and collect, we still feel as if something’s missing. Indeed there is – the unconditional awareness that nothing is missing. We are, in truth, complete and whole already.

Nothing can make you happy if you won’t accept for yourself that happiness rests within you. You see…

I know people with fancy dishwasher’s who aren’t happy.

I’ve met people with elaborate stereo-sound TV sets, complete with remote control, who are absolutely miserable.

I know men who wear Armani and still feel inferior.

I know women who can afford to buy a dozen Gucci watches but still have no time for themselves.

I have friends who are famous and loved by millions, yet cannot bear to love themselves. I have friends who can afford a house cleaner, but still, all their life is a chore.

I know women who wear real diamonds but still have no real sparkle in their lives.

It is the conclusion of the most extensive psychological and sociological research into happiness, that nothing can make you happy. Just as it’s true that the pursuit of happiness fails to make you happy, so too does materialism fail to make you happy. Happiness is a decision only you can make.

Robert Holden is the author of Happiness Now! and Be Happy among other works. He will be in Sydney and Melbourne for I Can Do It! 2011. For more details and tickets CLICK HERE.

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One Response to “Choosing Happiness – Robert Holden”
  1. Ornella says:

    I can’t believe that this is the blog I’ve been looking forward to reading. I got a heads up on it a few days ago on my email that there was a new blog; but I haven’t had a chance to read it till right now! OMG ok this morning I was at my childrens school making pancakes in the staff room for 500 kids. I know it’s crazy and it was crazy. Who cares we do it for the children for Pancake Tuesday. So the staff were coming in and out of the staff room starting up conversations about many topics from hair cuts to allergies to foods, to cheating on your spouse. Yup you heard that right , infidelity! So Happiness was a huge part of that topic. Once I heard many different people speak with their opinions on things I said my piece about what I thought. I’ve known the staff there for over ten years, so I felt comfortable enough to address this tender topic and remember when I blog it’s my own opinion and we all have different ways to look at things, anyway I said that when people say “he/she doesn’t make me happy anymore,so we are splitting up” well I say too bad, that wasn’t thier job to make you happy that’s an easy way out for whatever reason. You’ve set yourself up for disappointment if you thought that someone else was suppose to make you happy. We are suppose to make our own happiness. I remember years ago going through something very difficult and put all this stress on my poor husband that he was suppose to make me happy! Then one day (Thank God) it hit me , why do I expect someone else to make me happy? Is it because I’m going through something and can’t do it for myself, so I expect that if they love me I should be floating on a cloud with happiness. That’s unrealistic your loved one can be supportive and be there for you and listen to you but they can’t make you a quick order of happiness. You have to make that for yourself happy and then you can be happy together.
    As far as material things I love them! LOL I know you probably didn’t expect me to say that but I do! But only when I buy them for myself because it’s something I really love & enjoy , like a book for example ( when I could get it from the library but it’s a simple pleasure so I buy it) or when the people that love me give them to me out of love. I have found over the years that my husband spoils me but if things aren’t good between us I could care less about the material things. They mean absolutely nothing! I could say that maybe it’s because as a child growing up we had a great tragedy and didn’t have much but we still knew how to be happy; but that’s not true because so many people have so many different things happen to them through their lifetime and they all come out of it differently. Some positive some negative, so I believe it’s our own indiviual journey that makes us feel what we feel. Sometimes I say to my husband if we had to sell everything tomorrow and live in a box I can do it as long as we are together with our children. Things are just things and we attach ourselves to them for so many different reasons. The key is to be able to peel away at each layer to find what it is that you feel is missing! Maybe it’s bigger than we could ever really think about ,like HOME maybe if you believe in reincarnation maybe we are missing a place we can’t recognize here. Who knows? The question to ask yourself is “If I lost everything tomorrow, would I still be ok?” And than make sure that your answer can be the one you want it to be. Remember THINGS will never make anyone happy. Happines is easier to find than you think. Help someone that seems to be an easy way to be happy, do things you enjoy doing! OOPs gotta go I have an appointment. Great read thank you!
    Ornella~

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